Allow me to Reintroduce Myself
Hey. I’m Jayla. Formerly known on the internet as HeyImJayla, I started my first blog in 2010 and launched my YouTube channel under HeyImJayla in 2013. I have spent ten years trying to get my YouTube channel off the ground, but I ran into the same issue over and over. I loved writing.
Since I was a little girl, I have always loved reading and writing. I spent most of my free time writing short stories and dreaming up new worlds and characters for entertainment. As I grew up, my teachers, family, and friends would comment on how excellent my writing was for my age. A nice lady from my childhood church in Florida, Ms. Gwen, would greet me the same way every Sunday morning.
“Hey, Little Evangelist! When are you going to write your book!?”
Although I showed her many of my stories, she always encouraged me to keep writing because God was going to use me to help others through my writing. I didn’t see how my writing could help anyone. I mean, after all, I was a kid, and those fancy preachers who sold books every day seemed so much better than anything I could make. Why would anyone listen to me?
But, even after all of these years, Ms. Gwen was always right. In fact, before deciding to commit to this blog, I reached out to friends and family who knew me very well for a bit of a fishbowl analysis of myself. As a “thought daughter” aka Overthinker, I am often a little too close to the mirror to see the bigger picture. After watching a video about how wealthy people are often wealthy because they do something well. For example, anyone can become a model, but only the best models stay in the game long enough to thrive and prosper.
And since I wasn’t making plans to be on anyone’s runway anytime soon, I decided to take a simple approach. I texted my trusted circle with a simple question: “What do you think I’m good at?”
It felt a little vain in the moment. Like, why am I asking people what I’m good at when I already have some sort of idea as to what they might say? I guess I wanted confirmation, but I got something very different.
The top five “talents” were as follows:
Writing, research, fashion, empathy/hospitality, and creativity.
Writing felt more like an “I told you so” moment for the Holy Spirit because I genuinely doubted myself in that area. I believe that we often have doubts in areas where God wants to use us the most. I mean, why would the enemy try to discourage you at something you’re already not very confident or remotely good at? I’ve never had doubts about my basketball abilities because I’m 5’3 with an astigmatism, and I run on the sides of my feet. So, I was already never making it to the league, friend. But I have felt so much doubt and pushback about writing from the negative voices in my head. But God didn’t make me fear and doubt about what may come with my decision to write professionally. So, I’m leaning into my writing now more than ever. Our world so desperately needs the written word. Not just for entertainment, but for our faith as well. With all of the shiny distractions, it’s difficult to feel that my writing would ever help anyone in the future. But, if it helps just one person-it’s worth sharing.
Research was a hilarious response, but so very true. The way my brain latches onto an idea or topic and I find myself completely immersed in it for hours, days, even weeks! When “Scandoval” (a la Vanderpump Rules) happened, I didn’t stop talking or thinking about it for three weeks straight. But, this also has its upsides because I refuse to be comfortable in ignorance, but I also love the thrill of learning new things and sharing them with anyone who will listen. But don’t worry. I’ll make it entertaining, too. You’ll see this in my upcoming series of video essays, ranging from the latest microtrend to the entire history of forgotten reality TV gold.
Fashion is a big one for me because I have been a fashion geek since I was a kid. I would spend a lot of time sketching or putting on fashion shows with my dolls. The playlist was also on point every time Barbie had to strut her stuff, if I do say so myself. I even planned a church fashion show at age 9! But I wasn’t able to go to fashion school. The adage “Go where the money is” was very instrumental in choosing the university with the highest scholarship offerings. That didn’t stop me from learning about garment design, heritage brands, or watching fashion shows every year. It’s like fashion school without the crippling student loan debt. I’ll be sure to implement this by doing styling posts, shopping guides, and reviewing new collections!
As for my creativity and hospitality, well, I think that will come through with anything I do. I never want to make anyone feel unwanted or rejected, because I know what that feels like. There’s no limit to God’s love for every person, and I do want to love people the way God loves us. Or at least as close to that as humanly possible. I want any and everyone who feels interested in what I bring to the table to feel that they have a proper place setting and a seat at said table. Period. I want this space to feel like the most eclectic, fun, and delightful intimate dinner party with your closest friends. Well-dressed, well-fed, and warm.
Now, this isn’t a brag session about all of the things I’m good at, but I did everything to self-sabotage my gifts. I did what so many people with big dreams do- I ran from them.
I was doing anything to distract myself.
“What if they don’t like my writing?”
“What if I never become an author?”
“What if no one watches?”
And then the smallest voice whispered, “But, what if you never try and miss what God can do with just work and a little faith?”
So, here I am. Almost 13 years later, I have the same dreams and aspirations, but this time, I’m just doing what comes naturally. Sure, I will probably always make videos and social media content, but the basis for my namesake will have writing at its core. Because I believe that’s where I find much of myself daily. So many thoughts and words, and yet, it’s difficult to share them all in a world obsessed with the perfection of production. Instead of letting my worries and insecurities about my content dictate whether or not I share my thoughts and ideas, I have made my own cozy corner of the internet. There are no threats of apps disappearing or algorithm anxiety. The only”competition” is me.
Make yourself right at home, because this is officially the chicest little corner of the internet, and you’re a very special guest. On this blog, I plan to delve into the world of fashion, history, faith, beauty, and travel. Some topics might include the downfall of preteen brands like Limited Too, the impact of the Bling Ring, or even the amazing resale industry in Japan. There are no limits, and that is freeing.
Who needs a niche when you have a blog?
As I look back at my twenties and face my thirties in the coming months, I am so humbled to have experienced so much in life. I have tried many things in the past to try to become a YouTuber, Influencer, or something of that sort. But this doesn’t feel like trying anymore. This feels…right. So, thank you for accompanying me on this journey if you’re a long-time follower of HeyImJayla. I hope you’ll join me on the next one. But this time, on a first-name basis.
xo Jayla R. Mateo